Is it because we love our men so much that it's easy for them to infuriate us? I really try to have patience with my husband but sometimes I feel like he just wants to see how far he can push me before I snap.
This deployment has been hell on both of us. We've had enough to be worried and upset about for a lifetime and, still, we're facing the possibility of doing ANOTHER deployment before they pull out the troops in 2014. I don't know how people have multiples of these under their belts. One and I feel like snapping. I'm just one of those wives who really likes their husbands. It gives me no joy having him gone. Call me crazy but I kinda like my husband, that's why I married him.
He is just a man though. I shouldn't expect as much as I do from him with him being deployed but I don't want to watch the best pieces of him that I love fall away. He is so kind and even tempered at home, rarely quick to shout. Over there, he is short in conversation (some because of what he is doing and some because....I don't know why) with a short temper to match.
I want so much for him to be home, he has peace when he is here. He's not stressed day in and day out. People tell me he won't be the same when he gets home, that he'll have a hard time finding his place back within our family. I would give him all the time in the world but I don't want him to feel as though there is not a place here for him.
No matter how frustrated I get over things, my love for him never falters. I wish I was counting down hours until his homecoming, unfortunately it is still months. Before too long we will be counting hours and until then I'll try to keep up my strength for him, for Tyler and for myself.
No matter our fights or disagreements I am still his wife and he is still the love of my life.... ♥
Thursday, November 08, 2012
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Alone, sick and bored....
When Neil was home, any time I was sick he would always take care of things around the house on the weekend and would let me rest. He would even bring me breakfast in bed.
Last night, I went to bed knowing that I had a sore throat coming on. It had been going on all day and I finally gave into it and took some NyQuil and went to bed. This morning I woke up and there was no doubt that the sore throat was there. It took me forever to get moving and Tyler was gracious enough to let me lay in bed while he entertained himself in his room. I finally rolled out of bed and got us both dressed so we could run out and grab some food and retreat right back to the house. And here we've been all day. Tyler has been watching movies on his DVD player and I've been planted on the couch watching some DVD's I got out at the library.
One thing I learned today about men is that they are just born ignoring women. It's not a learned thing or them just being fed up with women. Tyler was watching TV and I got up to go put my car in the garage and he looked at me and I said to him 'I'm going to go put the car in the garage, I'll be right back.' and he turned back to his TV without saying anything so I said 'Tyler, did you hear me?' he turned to me and said 'Yes.' so I said 'What did I say?' he said 'Ummm you're going potty?'. So I said 'Noooo! I'm going to put my car in the garage.' To which I then mumbled under my breath that he was definitely a man! I already feel bad for his future wife.....or husband!
I've spent all day wrapped up in my blanket and my hoodie but I would've given anything to have been wrapped up in Neil's arms all day long. I can only hope for an improvement tomorrow. Being inside all day drove me insane and I didn't want to spend the weekend like this. Tyler works hard at school all week and my working out takes up the time that he is at school and now we couldn't even enjoy our weekend together. I hope we will be able to do something tomorrow and that this cold will just be a horrible memory.
I was looking at the countdowns that I have on my phone and realized that we're already into the double digits to this shitty deployment ending! I'm so over it all and feel so alone and exposed without him here. There are days when I feel like I don't have a friend in the world and I call my Mother way too late to chat her ear off or just to feel like I'm close to someone. I'm glad that Neil has reenlisted because he loves this life and I love him happy (although he DID sign his paperwork nearly a month ago and has YET to have his ceremony) but it will be great to be back on the East Coast and try a new duty station on for size! We've both learned a lot here and grown as people but it's time to move on! One of the things that we agreed upon about getting into this Army life as a family is that we wanted to travel and see new things/experience new places and I'm ready to have him home and see somewhere new! There is still lots of places around here that we want to see before we PCS and we are hoping to leave early before we have to be at our next duty station so we can see California before we go!
I love you, Neil, come home to us soon! ♥
Last night, I went to bed knowing that I had a sore throat coming on. It had been going on all day and I finally gave into it and took some NyQuil and went to bed. This morning I woke up and there was no doubt that the sore throat was there. It took me forever to get moving and Tyler was gracious enough to let me lay in bed while he entertained himself in his room. I finally rolled out of bed and got us both dressed so we could run out and grab some food and retreat right back to the house. And here we've been all day. Tyler has been watching movies on his DVD player and I've been planted on the couch watching some DVD's I got out at the library.
One thing I learned today about men is that they are just born ignoring women. It's not a learned thing or them just being fed up with women. Tyler was watching TV and I got up to go put my car in the garage and he looked at me and I said to him 'I'm going to go put the car in the garage, I'll be right back.' and he turned back to his TV without saying anything so I said 'Tyler, did you hear me?' he turned to me and said 'Yes.' so I said 'What did I say?' he said 'Ummm you're going potty?'. So I said 'Noooo! I'm going to put my car in the garage.' To which I then mumbled under my breath that he was definitely a man! I already feel bad for his future wife.....or husband!
I've spent all day wrapped up in my blanket and my hoodie but I would've given anything to have been wrapped up in Neil's arms all day long. I can only hope for an improvement tomorrow. Being inside all day drove me insane and I didn't want to spend the weekend like this. Tyler works hard at school all week and my working out takes up the time that he is at school and now we couldn't even enjoy our weekend together. I hope we will be able to do something tomorrow and that this cold will just be a horrible memory.
I was looking at the countdowns that I have on my phone and realized that we're already into the double digits to this shitty deployment ending! I'm so over it all and feel so alone and exposed without him here. There are days when I feel like I don't have a friend in the world and I call my Mother way too late to chat her ear off or just to feel like I'm close to someone. I'm glad that Neil has reenlisted because he loves this life and I love him happy (although he DID sign his paperwork nearly a month ago and has YET to have his ceremony) but it will be great to be back on the East Coast and try a new duty station on for size! We've both learned a lot here and grown as people but it's time to move on! One of the things that we agreed upon about getting into this Army life as a family is that we wanted to travel and see new things/experience new places and I'm ready to have him home and see somewhere new! There is still lots of places around here that we want to see before we PCS and we are hoping to leave early before we have to be at our next duty station so we can see California before we go!
I love you, Neil, come home to us soon! ♥
Monday, October 08, 2012
The second loss....
Yesterday, October 7th, I came home after having dinner with my son to find my nearly two year old Maltese standing in his cage swaying side to side and salivating. I'd worried he'd had a seizure and called the Animal Emergency Clinic. They agreed and wanted me to bring him in since he wasn't coming back to and was wandering around the house aimlessly.
I loaded him up in his carrier and off we went rushing to Tacoma. Tyler and I ran through the front doors and they called from a triage team to come out and get Tigger. They rushed him back to take his vitals and to assess him. I filled out paperwork, shaking the whole time. We finished and they sat Tyler and I in a room and we waited for the doctor to come back with her assessment. It felt like hours but she came in and told us that she believed he had had another seizure in the car on the way there. His vitals were good but he was unresponsive and had tried to seize on the table so they gave him some anti-seizure meds. She ruled out epilepsy right away since he wouldn't have had so many seizures back to back.
The doctor went back to run some more tests and I went outside to call my parents and get some perspective. I sobbed and they tried to reassure me but I already knew it wasn't looking good for my Tiggy. The doctor came back out with Tiggy wrapped up in a blanket and wanted to give me some time to hold him and to let him know that I was still there. I held him and he was limp up against my body with his hot breath panting onto my chest. I didn't want him to suffer and I could already tell that he wasn't himself. She gave me some of the results but said that Tigger wasn't getting any stronger and his balance was getting worse, he could barely walk. She said we could give him the evening and reevaluate in the morning but that if he took a turn for the worse in the middle of the night that they would just make the decision to put him out of his pain. She wasn't ready to give up on him if I wasn't ready but she said that even if they could get him stable enough for surgery that, after so many seizures, there was no telling what his quality of life would be afterward but that he was nowhere near strong enough to discuss those options at the moment and he was only getting worse.
She took Tiggy back to get him comfortable again and I called my Mother and told her everything that was going on. I knew what I had to do for him but I couldn't bear the thought of asking them to end his life when, in my eyes, he was still my little puppy. I talked to the doctor again and she said that he was still trying to seize but that the meds were keeping it at bay but his time was drawing to a close and that the best thing for him would be to let him go. I agreed and they went back to prep the team and Tigger.
They brought Tyler and I into a room and they layed a blanket on the table so he would be comfortable. I tried to explain to Tyler that we had to say goodbye to Tigger but he didn't seem to understand. They brought him in and laid him on the table. I kept looking into his eyes and petting his head. He was already so at peace and closed his eyes every time I brushed his fur back on his head. I gave him kisses on his nose repeatedly hoping that he would kiss me back but he was too lethargic. Tyler kissed him too and then a nice nurse came in and took Tyler out to the waiting room and got him some candy. I stayed with Tigger and soon after Tyler left the doctor came in. I talked to her a little about Tigger and what an amazing dog he is. She asked if I wanted more time alone with him and I said no, I knew it would only prolong the inevitable and I knew that he was ready to rest. She went on the other side of him and I got closer to his face and kept telling him I loved him and how sorry I was. She took the syringes out of her pocket and placed them on the table beside him. She started by flushing his line, then giving him a sedative and then the over dose. I begged him to forgive me and that I was so sorry I couldn't do more. I kissed him one last time and the doctor told me 'He's gone.'. I cried and held onto him and the doctor stepped out of the room. I couldn't believe he was gone. I still can't. I continued to pet him and talk to him and after awhile the doctor came in. Behind sobs I told her about how he had this stupid haircut as his last one. How the groomers had found his ears too matted and they just shaved them without telling me and I was so mad. She said it seemed to fit him, it really did. My spunky, unique Tigger. The doctor cried with me as I relayed stories about him, my marvelous Maltese.
I said my last goodbyes and she covered him up and then picked him up off the table. All those images in that room were burned into my brain. I found it hard to remember his bark, his kisses, how he would run around the house or greet me when I came home. All I could see were those sad eyes that were vacant with no hint of recognition in them. My young puppy. I wish I could've done more. I wish there would've been more to do.
We had so many amazing memories with him including our vacation to Florida. Not many Pacific Northwest dogs get to vacation in sunny Florida! He was a lucky puppy and we were lucky to be part of his life, albeit not for long. We love you so much, Tigger! I hope you're at peace and that you know that everything we did was out of love for you! Had one detail been different I would've done everything in my power to keep you alive but I knew your little body was giving up despite what a tough dog you actually were. Please watch over us and remind us of your presence whenever you can!
RIP Tigger Humphreys, 28 December 2010 - 7 October 2012
I loaded him up in his carrier and off we went rushing to Tacoma. Tyler and I ran through the front doors and they called from a triage team to come out and get Tigger. They rushed him back to take his vitals and to assess him. I filled out paperwork, shaking the whole time. We finished and they sat Tyler and I in a room and we waited for the doctor to come back with her assessment. It felt like hours but she came in and told us that she believed he had had another seizure in the car on the way there. His vitals were good but he was unresponsive and had tried to seize on the table so they gave him some anti-seizure meds. She ruled out epilepsy right away since he wouldn't have had so many seizures back to back.
The doctor went back to run some more tests and I went outside to call my parents and get some perspective. I sobbed and they tried to reassure me but I already knew it wasn't looking good for my Tiggy. The doctor came back out with Tiggy wrapped up in a blanket and wanted to give me some time to hold him and to let him know that I was still there. I held him and he was limp up against my body with his hot breath panting onto my chest. I didn't want him to suffer and I could already tell that he wasn't himself. She gave me some of the results but said that Tigger wasn't getting any stronger and his balance was getting worse, he could barely walk. She said we could give him the evening and reevaluate in the morning but that if he took a turn for the worse in the middle of the night that they would just make the decision to put him out of his pain. She wasn't ready to give up on him if I wasn't ready but she said that even if they could get him stable enough for surgery that, after so many seizures, there was no telling what his quality of life would be afterward but that he was nowhere near strong enough to discuss those options at the moment and he was only getting worse.
She took Tiggy back to get him comfortable again and I called my Mother and told her everything that was going on. I knew what I had to do for him but I couldn't bear the thought of asking them to end his life when, in my eyes, he was still my little puppy. I talked to the doctor again and she said that he was still trying to seize but that the meds were keeping it at bay but his time was drawing to a close and that the best thing for him would be to let him go. I agreed and they went back to prep the team and Tigger.
They brought Tyler and I into a room and they layed a blanket on the table so he would be comfortable. I tried to explain to Tyler that we had to say goodbye to Tigger but he didn't seem to understand. They brought him in and laid him on the table. I kept looking into his eyes and petting his head. He was already so at peace and closed his eyes every time I brushed his fur back on his head. I gave him kisses on his nose repeatedly hoping that he would kiss me back but he was too lethargic. Tyler kissed him too and then a nice nurse came in and took Tyler out to the waiting room and got him some candy. I stayed with Tigger and soon after Tyler left the doctor came in. I talked to her a little about Tigger and what an amazing dog he is. She asked if I wanted more time alone with him and I said no, I knew it would only prolong the inevitable and I knew that he was ready to rest. She went on the other side of him and I got closer to his face and kept telling him I loved him and how sorry I was. She took the syringes out of her pocket and placed them on the table beside him. She started by flushing his line, then giving him a sedative and then the over dose. I begged him to forgive me and that I was so sorry I couldn't do more. I kissed him one last time and the doctor told me 'He's gone.'. I cried and held onto him and the doctor stepped out of the room. I couldn't believe he was gone. I still can't. I continued to pet him and talk to him and after awhile the doctor came in. Behind sobs I told her about how he had this stupid haircut as his last one. How the groomers had found his ears too matted and they just shaved them without telling me and I was so mad. She said it seemed to fit him, it really did. My spunky, unique Tigger. The doctor cried with me as I relayed stories about him, my marvelous Maltese.
I said my last goodbyes and she covered him up and then picked him up off the table. All those images in that room were burned into my brain. I found it hard to remember his bark, his kisses, how he would run around the house or greet me when I came home. All I could see were those sad eyes that were vacant with no hint of recognition in them. My young puppy. I wish I could've done more. I wish there would've been more to do.
We had so many amazing memories with him including our vacation to Florida. Not many Pacific Northwest dogs get to vacation in sunny Florida! He was a lucky puppy and we were lucky to be part of his life, albeit not for long. We love you so much, Tigger! I hope you're at peace and that you know that everything we did was out of love for you! Had one detail been different I would've done everything in my power to keep you alive but I knew your little body was giving up despite what a tough dog you actually were. Please watch over us and remind us of your presence whenever you can!
RIP Tigger Humphreys, 28 December 2010 - 7 October 2012
Saturday, January 08, 2011
The Surgery
It finally happened! I went under the knife and had my gallbladder removed. After over a year of living with the pain and trying to manage it on my own it came down to me laying on a cold operating table while I bid adieu to my pesky gallbladder and the stone that had made my life hell.
The night before I had to take a shower and use some prep cloth on the surgery site. I did so and then in the morning I had a second cloth that I had to use right before leaving the house. We loaded all three of us into the car along with everything to entertain Tyler in the hospital with for a few hours. We got to the hospital and I went up to the surgery check-in desk, got my vitals taken then went and sat in the play area with Tyler while I waited for them to call my name. It took about an hour but they called my name and led us all into the operating waiting room. They checked all of my information again, confirmed what surgery I was having and then sent me into a dressing area where I shimmied out of my clothes and into their finest hospital gowns. I waited freezing cold while they led me and two gentlemen to our beds in the next room. We got in our own, separate beds, and each of us were visited by nurses. I got to meet the nurses who were going to be there during my surgery. Both were very nice! The one told me how we were meant to be because she had little snowflakes on her Croc looking shoes and I still had the snowflakes embellished on my ring fingers! It really did feel like God was watching over me!
It all seemed to go pretty quick once we were in there. Next the nurse came in who was going to start my IV. She patted my hand for a few minutes and then asked me if the other one was better, I told her that the hand she was currently taping was the one that they tapped into when I was in the hospital having Ty. She eventually got it all in and then the anesthesiologist came over and told me she would be taking care of me while I was out. She told Neil and I to say our goodbyes so we did and Tyler was lifted up and gave me kisses and told me 'Goodnight'. They wheeled me into the operating room and switched me from my bed to the operating table before I knew it I was waking up in the recovery room. I don't recall them letting me know that they were going to be putting me out but there I was in recovery. The nurse asked me how I was feeling and I told her that I was nauseous and she said she would give me something for it. I asked her how the surgery went and she told me it went fine.
Once I was a little more with it she brought in Neil and Tyler to see me. I guess it was a little much for Tyler though because the nurse was sending them back to the waiting room. I stayed there for awhile because my doctor had scrubbed in on another case and wasn't able to get the paperwork together to send me out. Eventually she got a hold of him, got me dressed and into the wheelchair. Once she was confident that I wasn't feeling dizzy she took my IV out and then wheeled me down to wait for Neil to bring the car around. They helped me into the car and we went home.
Here I am, sat on the couch where I have been since we got home yesterday. I've not traveled very far and get up every once in awhile to just keep myself from getting too stiff in the abdomen.
Now I feel like taking a nap again so I must go! Thanks for reading and thanks for all the well wishes!
The night before I had to take a shower and use some prep cloth on the surgery site. I did so and then in the morning I had a second cloth that I had to use right before leaving the house. We loaded all three of us into the car along with everything to entertain Tyler in the hospital with for a few hours. We got to the hospital and I went up to the surgery check-in desk, got my vitals taken then went and sat in the play area with Tyler while I waited for them to call my name. It took about an hour but they called my name and led us all into the operating waiting room. They checked all of my information again, confirmed what surgery I was having and then sent me into a dressing area where I shimmied out of my clothes and into their finest hospital gowns. I waited freezing cold while they led me and two gentlemen to our beds in the next room. We got in our own, separate beds, and each of us were visited by nurses. I got to meet the nurses who were going to be there during my surgery. Both were very nice! The one told me how we were meant to be because she had little snowflakes on her Croc looking shoes and I still had the snowflakes embellished on my ring fingers! It really did feel like God was watching over me!
It all seemed to go pretty quick once we were in there. Next the nurse came in who was going to start my IV. She patted my hand for a few minutes and then asked me if the other one was better, I told her that the hand she was currently taping was the one that they tapped into when I was in the hospital having Ty. She eventually got it all in and then the anesthesiologist came over and told me she would be taking care of me while I was out. She told Neil and I to say our goodbyes so we did and Tyler was lifted up and gave me kisses and told me 'Goodnight'. They wheeled me into the operating room and switched me from my bed to the operating table before I knew it I was waking up in the recovery room. I don't recall them letting me know that they were going to be putting me out but there I was in recovery. The nurse asked me how I was feeling and I told her that I was nauseous and she said she would give me something for it. I asked her how the surgery went and she told me it went fine.
Once I was a little more with it she brought in Neil and Tyler to see me. I guess it was a little much for Tyler though because the nurse was sending them back to the waiting room. I stayed there for awhile because my doctor had scrubbed in on another case and wasn't able to get the paperwork together to send me out. Eventually she got a hold of him, got me dressed and into the wheelchair. Once she was confident that I wasn't feeling dizzy she took my IV out and then wheeled me down to wait for Neil to bring the car around. They helped me into the car and we went home.
Here I am, sat on the couch where I have been since we got home yesterday. I've not traveled very far and get up every once in awhile to just keep myself from getting too stiff in the abdomen.
Now I feel like taking a nap again so I must go! Thanks for reading and thanks for all the well wishes!
Monday, November 29, 2010
It's been too long....
I feel like I've been neglecting you, dear blog. It has been a whirlwind since Neil got home though. We had less than a week to pack up our life in Florida, say goodbye to our family and head off for the great state of Washington in the Pacific Northwest. We had an amazing time with our family and I feel that we made the most by saying goodbye to everyone. There are some of my family members that I felt I left things unresolved with but I'm happy to hear that they are all working on it together even though I can't be there.
Let me take this moment to go through our driving journal and tell you guys about how we ended up getting here to Washington!
Obviously, we set off from Florida on November 6th. We knew that it was going to take us five days and towards the end of our trip we were going to hit snow of some sort. It was a great ride and we had so much fun. Here goes:
November 6th: Oviedo, FL to Paducah, KY
We set off at 7:25a, right on schedule! We stopped off at Publix to pick up some ice for our cooler. We hit the highway at 7:37a. At 9:09a Neil woke me up (he had taken the first leg of driving) and said 'I think I just got busted speeding.' I look in the side mirror and sure enough there is FHP behind us. I pull out all of our details and hand them to the trooper. She was very nice but Neil was still issued a ticket since she felt (and I completely agree) that he should've been driving more safely with his family in the car. No reason to be mad or anything, I figured one of us would probably get one on the way up there. But by no means did I want it to happen! This was around Gainsville so we pulled over to get gas and switch drivers. At 11:01a we crossed into Georgia. At 2:37p we stopped in Jackson, GA to get gas and to switch drivers again. 4:05p we were in Allatoona, GA when we started to see mountains. It was then that we arranged a slight detour to see Neil's battle buddy, Beaty, in Cleveland, TN. 5:05p we crossed into TN. We stopped for an hour or so to see Beaty and then hit the road again. 8:30p we hit the central time zone. 8:24p we stopped for gas again in Monteagle, TN. 11:40p we crossed into Kentucky! Then finally at 12:55a we arrived at our first hotel, the Days Inn in Paducah, KY! Temperature on arrival was 31 degrees!
November 7th: Paducah, KY to Sioux Falls, SD
8:00a Set off on the road after stopping at BK for breakfast and filling up the tank. 1:42p stopped for gas again while listening to the Bears game on Sirius! Stopped in Nelson, MO. It was a toasty 73 degrees outside! Switched to me driving. 4:50p Crossed the Iowa state line. 6:00p we stooped for gas again and to clean the many dead bugs off of the car. 7:20p crossed into South Dakota. About 50mi before that my car hit 55k! It was 62 degrees outside. 8:30p we arrived at our hotel, Days Inn Sioux Falls, SD.
November 8th: Sioux Falls, SD to Helena, MT
7:45a set off for Mount Rushmore! 10:15a stopped for gas in Oacoma/Chamberlain, SD. 2:00p we arrived at Mount Rushmore! We stayed there for just over an hour and dropped $100 in their gift shop! Can't wait to send the goodies to those back home! 3:20p we were back on the road headed for Helena, MT. At that point I was still driving in case we were to hit snow in Montana. At that time Neil was going to take over. Either way he would take over in Montana. 4:45p we stopped for gas in Sturgis, SD! It was 65 degrees outside. 7:00p we stopped at a rest area for bathroom breaks and to change Tyler's diaper. At this point we switched drivers and Neil took over. 8:00p we stopped for gas again in Crow Agency, MT. The temperature had dipped significantly to 38 degrees! 11:10p Stopped for gas again in Bozeman, MT. At this point it was 31 degrees outside and snowing!! 1:41a we finally arrived at the Motel 6 in Helena, MT. Temp was 34 degrees!
November 9th: Helena, MT to Fort Lewis, WA
8:00a Set off for our final destination! 9:00a Stopped for gas at Exxon in Helena. 12:25p Entered Idaho and Pacific Time Zone! 31 degrees outside, still was seeing on/off flurries but there was beautiful snowy scenery to look at. Time changed us to 11:25a. 11:55a Stopped for gas at a Chevron in Pinehurst, ID at this point it was 44 degrees. 1:25p Made a pit stop in Spokane, WA to see my friend Lori and two of her four beautiful children! It was so awesome to meet her (she's a Mommy board friend) and of course to get our two February '08 babies together! 3:45p Back on the road headed for Fort Lewis, currently 43 degrees! 7:45 we stopped for gas in Maple Valley, WA. Around 9p we arrived on McChord Air Force Base after MUCH driving around and trying to find out how to get on post. Thankful to be here and ready for sleep!
Well - that was it! I will write more tomorrow about our stay here so far. Now I'm off to play a game with the hubby!
Let me take this moment to go through our driving journal and tell you guys about how we ended up getting here to Washington!
Obviously, we set off from Florida on November 6th. We knew that it was going to take us five days and towards the end of our trip we were going to hit snow of some sort. It was a great ride and we had so much fun. Here goes:
November 6th: Oviedo, FL to Paducah, KY
We set off at 7:25a, right on schedule! We stopped off at Publix to pick up some ice for our cooler. We hit the highway at 7:37a. At 9:09a Neil woke me up (he had taken the first leg of driving) and said 'I think I just got busted speeding.' I look in the side mirror and sure enough there is FHP behind us. I pull out all of our details and hand them to the trooper. She was very nice but Neil was still issued a ticket since she felt (and I completely agree) that he should've been driving more safely with his family in the car. No reason to be mad or anything, I figured one of us would probably get one on the way up there. But by no means did I want it to happen! This was around Gainsville so we pulled over to get gas and switch drivers. At 11:01a we crossed into Georgia. At 2:37p we stopped in Jackson, GA to get gas and to switch drivers again. 4:05p we were in Allatoona, GA when we started to see mountains. It was then that we arranged a slight detour to see Neil's battle buddy, Beaty, in Cleveland, TN. 5:05p we crossed into TN. We stopped for an hour or so to see Beaty and then hit the road again. 8:30p we hit the central time zone. 8:24p we stopped for gas again in Monteagle, TN. 11:40p we crossed into Kentucky! Then finally at 12:55a we arrived at our first hotel, the Days Inn in Paducah, KY! Temperature on arrival was 31 degrees!
November 7th: Paducah, KY to Sioux Falls, SD
8:00a Set off on the road after stopping at BK for breakfast and filling up the tank. 1:42p stopped for gas again while listening to the Bears game on Sirius! Stopped in Nelson, MO. It was a toasty 73 degrees outside! Switched to me driving. 4:50p Crossed the Iowa state line. 6:00p we stooped for gas again and to clean the many dead bugs off of the car. 7:20p crossed into South Dakota. About 50mi before that my car hit 55k! It was 62 degrees outside. 8:30p we arrived at our hotel, Days Inn Sioux Falls, SD.
November 8th: Sioux Falls, SD to Helena, MT
7:45a set off for Mount Rushmore! 10:15a stopped for gas in Oacoma/Chamberlain, SD. 2:00p we arrived at Mount Rushmore! We stayed there for just over an hour and dropped $100 in their gift shop! Can't wait to send the goodies to those back home! 3:20p we were back on the road headed for Helena, MT. At that point I was still driving in case we were to hit snow in Montana. At that time Neil was going to take over. Either way he would take over in Montana. 4:45p we stopped for gas in Sturgis, SD! It was 65 degrees outside. 7:00p we stopped at a rest area for bathroom breaks and to change Tyler's diaper. At this point we switched drivers and Neil took over. 8:00p we stopped for gas again in Crow Agency, MT. The temperature had dipped significantly to 38 degrees! 11:10p Stopped for gas again in Bozeman, MT. At this point it was 31 degrees outside and snowing!! 1:41a we finally arrived at the Motel 6 in Helena, MT. Temp was 34 degrees!
November 9th: Helena, MT to Fort Lewis, WA
8:00a Set off for our final destination! 9:00a Stopped for gas at Exxon in Helena. 12:25p Entered Idaho and Pacific Time Zone! 31 degrees outside, still was seeing on/off flurries but there was beautiful snowy scenery to look at. Time changed us to 11:25a. 11:55a Stopped for gas at a Chevron in Pinehurst, ID at this point it was 44 degrees. 1:25p Made a pit stop in Spokane, WA to see my friend Lori and two of her four beautiful children! It was so awesome to meet her (she's a Mommy board friend) and of course to get our two February '08 babies together! 3:45p Back on the road headed for Fort Lewis, currently 43 degrees! 7:45 we stopped for gas in Maple Valley, WA. Around 9p we arrived on McChord Air Force Base after MUCH driving around and trying to find out how to get on post. Thankful to be here and ready for sleep!
Well - that was it! I will write more tomorrow about our stay here so far. Now I'm off to play a game with the hubby!
Thursday, October 28, 2010
I'm getting him back!
I feel reserved celebrating openly about getting my soldier back. While I have had some very pleasant experiences with fellow Army/military wives there are a few bad apples amongst the bunch. Including some who have condemned me for being excited about getting my soldier back after 'only' training when some still have lengthy amounts of time left until they see their deployed soldiers.
I don't place myself above anyone else or think that my situation requires any special attention but I don't see why I shouldn't be excited about getting MY soldier back. Every night that I go to bed I pray for every service man and woman who serves this great country and the spouses/family that they leave behind. My husband is important to me and amongst the top of my prayer list. Him finally leaving training means that he is ready to be deployed. At any time. I have no more guarantees and I get only limited time.
I'm thankful that he is finally coming home to spend some time with our family and to move to his first duty station. The Army makes no promises of time that I get with him from here on out so I beg your forgiveness if you're offended by my excitement about being given some time with him before we find out what his chances of deployment are/will be.
He is my soul mate. Without him, life would lose so much of it's meaning. I'm thankful for every moment that God gives me in this life with him. Some people have told me that these women are only bitter but I don't think that at all. I know what it's like to miss your husband and I know the fear in me just thinking about him being deployed. I hold no ill will against anyone and I'm thankful for those that have served, will serve and are serving right now. My husband IS amongst those.
I'll NEVER show anyone else disrespect when it comes to our soldiers, I just expect the same in return.
I am looking forward to getting my husband back tomorrow and I will be eagerly waiting and watching that arrivals board to see that he has finally landed and come back home to me and our son! Less than 24hrs and I'll be falling into those deep blue eyes of his.....
I don't place myself above anyone else or think that my situation requires any special attention but I don't see why I shouldn't be excited about getting MY soldier back. Every night that I go to bed I pray for every service man and woman who serves this great country and the spouses/family that they leave behind. My husband is important to me and amongst the top of my prayer list. Him finally leaving training means that he is ready to be deployed. At any time. I have no more guarantees and I get only limited time.
I'm thankful that he is finally coming home to spend some time with our family and to move to his first duty station. The Army makes no promises of time that I get with him from here on out so I beg your forgiveness if you're offended by my excitement about being given some time with him before we find out what his chances of deployment are/will be.
He is my soul mate. Without him, life would lose so much of it's meaning. I'm thankful for every moment that God gives me in this life with him. Some people have told me that these women are only bitter but I don't think that at all. I know what it's like to miss your husband and I know the fear in me just thinking about him being deployed. I hold no ill will against anyone and I'm thankful for those that have served, will serve and are serving right now. My husband IS amongst those.
I'll NEVER show anyone else disrespect when it comes to our soldiers, I just expect the same in return.
I am looking forward to getting my husband back tomorrow and I will be eagerly waiting and watching that arrivals board to see that he has finally landed and come back home to me and our son! Less than 24hrs and I'll be falling into those deep blue eyes of his.....
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
And then there are times when it's just not worth it....
Bitch.
I've been called that a fair few times. Sometimes I thought 'Wow. I really must be a piece of work' but I've put some thought into it while I've been separated from my husband and the quiet of my room while my toddler sleeps. If I am being labeled a bitch does it make me one because I protect my family? Because I stand up for the things I believe in? Because I won't let people talk badly about my husband and the choices that we've made as a family?
Because people feel the need to attack us, I have my guard up. It is no one's business what my husband chooses to do. For five years we've had lengthy talks of where our careers would take us and Neil did the best he could as a civilian once we moved to the US together but the Army has opened doors for us that we never dreamed imaginable. My husband is a born soldier. His mind works differently than my own and though I can not often wrap my mind around the things that he does and likes, I would never oppose him seeking out the things that made him happy. His happiness means the world to me.
To those critics reading and those who have voiced their opinions in the past, feel free to leave your unwanted criticisms at the door. Neil may be many things but the one thing he will never be is careless. The Army is providing him training and the tools for survival and I don't expect others to understand why he does this or to question this! He knows that he has a young family at home who loves him and he knows the risks out there but that is what is making him stand head and shoulders above the rest. He is taking all of his training in and learning how to apply it to real life situations. He is already taking his job very seriously and in the back of his mind is Tyler and I. I have faith in the Army that they're training him well.
But I digress. I am not a bitch, I stand up for my family and if, to you, that makes me a bitch than perhaps you need to do some evaluating on yourself. I would give my life for my son and my husband without a second thought and Neil is doing the same for us. Another quote that really speaks to me says: "My husband doesn't fight because he hates what is in front of him, he fights because he loves what is behind him." This is his country now. He is an American Citizen, an American Soldier. He doesn't take the Oath of Enlistment or the Citizenship Oath lightly. He wants to do all that he can to keep our nation safe.
This is why I don't feel like we need the people in our lives who put him down for his career choices. He doesn't come to your office and yell at you for sitting on your ass all day! Instead, he is willing to fight so you can have that freedom! The sad part is, some of these people are supposed to be his 'family'. There has been everything from a lack of support to coming right out and saying that they don't agree with it. When you talk about my husband behind his back to me, don't think that it stays there long. As soon as I have a moment to sit down with him, I tell him everything. We harbor no secrets. So next time you try to blow sunshine up his ass and tell him how proud you are of him just be well aware that he already knows the truth.
In the coming months and years we will find out who really deserves to be in our lives. I have a feeling I can already count about 10 people who will be quickly dropped from our lives and it won't come as a surprise when it happens. Some people you just don't get along with and it's nothing personal. It really is just conflicting personalities. I've tried a lot and mostly in vain. The people who are two-faced always continue to be two-faced. I can firmly say that no one likes people that are two-faced and everyone knows that you are, no matter how much you may try to hide it. People act like they like you only hoping to not get on your bad side but they know you can never be trusted. It's sad really. You will never be truly happy because you are too busy trying to make yourself look better to others.
There are people who come into our lives and you know that they are meant to be there. You know that God brought them into your life for a reason and then there are times when it's just not worth it....
I've been called that a fair few times. Sometimes I thought 'Wow. I really must be a piece of work' but I've put some thought into it while I've been separated from my husband and the quiet of my room while my toddler sleeps. If I am being labeled a bitch does it make me one because I protect my family? Because I stand up for the things I believe in? Because I won't let people talk badly about my husband and the choices that we've made as a family?
Because people feel the need to attack us, I have my guard up. It is no one's business what my husband chooses to do. For five years we've had lengthy talks of where our careers would take us and Neil did the best he could as a civilian once we moved to the US together but the Army has opened doors for us that we never dreamed imaginable. My husband is a born soldier. His mind works differently than my own and though I can not often wrap my mind around the things that he does and likes, I would never oppose him seeking out the things that made him happy. His happiness means the world to me.
To those critics reading and those who have voiced their opinions in the past, feel free to leave your unwanted criticisms at the door. Neil may be many things but the one thing he will never be is careless. The Army is providing him training and the tools for survival and I don't expect others to understand why he does this or to question this! He knows that he has a young family at home who loves him and he knows the risks out there but that is what is making him stand head and shoulders above the rest. He is taking all of his training in and learning how to apply it to real life situations. He is already taking his job very seriously and in the back of his mind is Tyler and I. I have faith in the Army that they're training him well.
But I digress. I am not a bitch, I stand up for my family and if, to you, that makes me a bitch than perhaps you need to do some evaluating on yourself. I would give my life for my son and my husband without a second thought and Neil is doing the same for us. Another quote that really speaks to me says: "My husband doesn't fight because he hates what is in front of him, he fights because he loves what is behind him." This is his country now. He is an American Citizen, an American Soldier. He doesn't take the Oath of Enlistment or the Citizenship Oath lightly. He wants to do all that he can to keep our nation safe.
This is why I don't feel like we need the people in our lives who put him down for his career choices. He doesn't come to your office and yell at you for sitting on your ass all day! Instead, he is willing to fight so you can have that freedom! The sad part is, some of these people are supposed to be his 'family'. There has been everything from a lack of support to coming right out and saying that they don't agree with it. When you talk about my husband behind his back to me, don't think that it stays there long. As soon as I have a moment to sit down with him, I tell him everything. We harbor no secrets. So next time you try to blow sunshine up his ass and tell him how proud you are of him just be well aware that he already knows the truth.
In the coming months and years we will find out who really deserves to be in our lives. I have a feeling I can already count about 10 people who will be quickly dropped from our lives and it won't come as a surprise when it happens. Some people you just don't get along with and it's nothing personal. It really is just conflicting personalities. I've tried a lot and mostly in vain. The people who are two-faced always continue to be two-faced. I can firmly say that no one likes people that are two-faced and everyone knows that you are, no matter how much you may try to hide it. People act like they like you only hoping to not get on your bad side but they know you can never be trusted. It's sad really. You will never be truly happy because you are too busy trying to make yourself look better to others.
There are people who come into our lives and you know that they are meant to be there. You know that God brought them into your life for a reason and then there are times when it's just not worth it....
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